Conversations in Jail - Jesus

How do I help my juvies understand how much Jesus loves them?
How do I make them understand how blessed I feel because I can spend time with them every week?

Their understanding of Jesus and Faith is basic at best. 3 months ago one of the worship songs had the word 'Hosanna' in it and they asked 'Miss, who's Hosanna?'

Every time I tell them that I KNOW people who would want to spend time with them and help them be successful they say 'Miss, who would want to spend time with us? We are criminals?'

There are so many things that make it hard to talk about Jesus. (One is, that they keep on calling me 'Miss')

But every few weeks I lay it out there. Every few weeks it's not about living a different life, but it's about the person who gives us life.

This was one of the weeks.

We talked about sin and how ALL sin separates us from God. No matter how big or small. In that way sin is sin and we are all the same before God.
We talked about the difference of consequence for some sins. Stealing a car and running a red light are a little different in consequences.
Then we talked about how God says that there is not one righteous person.

This was to lay the ground work. To help them understand that ALL sin separates us from God.

Then I moved on to what God has done for us. How He sent Jesus for 'WHOEVER'. I talked about who a whoever is.
We talked about what love is and that God loved us first. And how He's not insecure, so that if you don't love Him right now, He's not gonna sit in a corner and cry. But He's still gonna love you.

And then we talked about the 'now what?'. The fact that God wants to change their lives NOW and not when they get out. That is the hardest thing for me to explain and for them to get. I don't speak from experience here, but I know that they can do it!

They CAN do the hard things instead of just coasting (not swearing for a day!)
They CAN be an example in speech, in conduct, in faith in purity.. (1. Timothy 4:12).

You know what was weird? Usually during my talks (they are a bit of a hybrid between a talk and a small group) there are lots of interruptions. Comments, tangents, jokes.... There are a lot of things going on and often I have a hard time keeping their attentions.

But when I did this talk the room was eerily quiet. They all seemed to listen. There was no joking, no questions, no tangents. They just listened. They looked at me and listened.

And suddenly I had that hope again. The hope that God HAS a future and a hope for them. And that it's good. The hope that I will see some of them on the outside and see them succeed. Hope that I am not alone in this. But God is always right there.

I needed that.

Conversations in jail - Dads

This was not a conversation, but more an observation of the atmosphere...

When I go in to talk with my juvies I show them a DVD of the service from Central Christian Church. I only show them the worship, and then do a hybrid of a talk and small group myself afterwards, going along with whatever series is going on in our Junior High and High School environments at church.

But the worship is on DVD. Even though worship is definitely not their preferred style of music, they actually manage to sit through it quietly and every now and then I can even hear them 'sing' a word of two.

This time the worship included a description of how the worship leader spends time with his daughter before going to bed. They hang out and sing a few songs together in her room. Quite a special moment for both of them.

During this story everybody in the room got quiet. (There's usually some chatter going on). And I realised that this story struck a chord with them.

I don't know their stories, their families or what they've done. But I think I know enough to suspect that many of them did not have a Dad like that in their life. A dad who would have a special place and a special moment with them when they were little.

Or even when they were older.

The 'special' moments they've had were with their older brothers when they got introduced to gang members and were allowed to do little errands to earn trust.

Of course not every Dad has the time to do what that worship leader was talking about. But I think every Dad should make time to have that special moment or special activity together.

The special moments I remember with my Dad were at Christmas. My Mum prepared everything downstairs and Dad played with me and my brother upstairs, until Mum was ready.
Or the times during summer when my Dad, my brother and me played soccer after dinner.

My Dad wasn't able to do something every day. But he did stuff with us that only he could do (love my Mum, but she can't kick a ball for the life of her!)

So my prayer for my juvies is that God would help them to see Him. And that they would be able to have a special moment or a special activity with God. I've learned that God sometimes uses our parents to care for us, sometimes He uses other people and sometimes He just does it himself.

Since my juvies are kind of restricted by their location and the rules of their location I pray that God would do it Himself! :)

Conversations in jail - fights

Sometimes I ask my juvies questions and I am blown away by the honesty of their answer....

The latest one went like that:

Me: You guys like to see girls fight???
Them: Yes! It's HOT.
Me: REALLY?? You think that's attractive? As in, you would LIKE to go out with a girl who is not afraid to fight another girl???
Them: Heck yes!
Me: ..... 

Of course I had heard that before that guys think that. But it was more like a rumor to me. But to hear it from a bunch of guys (they ALL agreed) and to hear them talk about it so excitedly was kind of shocking to me.

The day before I was at a BBQ and was mucking around with one of the Junior High Boys. He took it one step further and proceeded to start hitting me with his bandana (like the kitchen towel fights). About 2.5 seconds after he started I heard one of the leaders tell him to stop. Reason? Because you don't hit ladies!

You might smile at that, but I was so thankful that someone was looking out for me. (Of course I could have taken on this 6th grade boy... But anybody could have! That is not the point!)
And I was super thankful that there is still this value of treating girls like girls.

Looking at my juvies I wish someone would have been there for them to tell them not to hit girl, not to hurt others, to respect life and even to be able to walk away and still have dignity.

I wish someone would have told them that their identity is not rooted in how many people they hurt or how many guns they have. But that their identity SHOULD be rooted in who they are in Christ. And that there are people around them who want to help them find that.

Like that leader who over the next 3 years will pour his life into that 6th grade boy to help him become a man. A man who will respect girls and who will pick girls that respect others as well.

One day your 6th grade boy or girl might be play fighting with a bandana. But if no one helps them to understand some boundaries I might get to hang out with them at jail. And I don't want that.

Conversations in jail - Names

My Juvies... I wish you could all meet them! They are incredible to me, make me smile, laugh and feel like I know a little better how God feels when we 'don't get it'.

I've told you before that I've been trying to learn names and that these guys sometimes give me their street names, rather than anything their parents may know them by. 

For me, it's ok to call them whatever they tell me I should call them as long as a) it's not offensive and b) they listen when I say 'their name'. 

The breakthrough came a few weeks back when some of them gave me their real name. That's a big deal for them. 

Names are powerful. We see that already in the Bible where names hold a certain meaning about the life of the individual. 

Names give us identity and therefore these guys like their street names. It's their identity. It's what they are known by, by their friends and also by their enemies. If they know how to handle themselves in tricky situations, then their street name carries importance and makes them feared by others. 

And that is also why giving me their real name is a sign of trust. And it makes me excited every time it happens. 

Today it didn't happen. I tried to learn all their names again and couldn't for the life of me remember the name of one of the guys. So they started 'helping' me. 

In the end, he 'suggested' to be called 'smurf' (They all wear blue!). I warned him that that's what I will call him unless he tells me his name (street name or real thing) and he decided smurf was ok with him. 

So I called him 'Smurf' the whole lesson long. And I grew quite fond of calling him that. And I think he did too! This might be the first 'cute' street name ever. 

I hope he keeps it! 

Good night Smurf! Hope you know how much Jesus Loves you! 

Loving what I do - my most recent newsletter

Right now I am sitting here, waiting for the other members of God Behind Bars to arrive to the meeting. I thought you might want to ‘meet’ them: 

John, Dave, Jake, Don, Bob and Me! (left to right)

We will have a ‘same page meeting’. We started these a couple months ago once we realized that sometimes there’s so much going on that nobody knows anymore what’s going on, except for Jake (CEO, founder and my boss).

So now we come together twice a month and get to hear what the others have been up to.

There’s John who’s working on creating jobs for released inmates, starting with a recycled dry-clean hanger scheme. But of course there’s more to that. We are also starting a thrift store (to employ inmates) which will have more the look and feel of a target.

Dave gives us updates on what’s happening in the area of resource development (read: fundraising to start more campuses)

Don is an amazing man who’s been in prison ministry for over 30 years. He helps us in any way imaginable, but especially dealing with the Department of Correction (which can be a challenge)

Bob has his finger on various grant applications that are in to get our Media Arts Studio INSIDE the prison some new equipment. (We are teaching inmates graphic art, video editing, life skills etc)

I will talk about stuff that’s going on with the youth, how I am going once a week into the jail and hang out with ‘my’ juvies. How we need funds to start another campus at ‘Caliente’. And how we are starting to really be ready to help youth that gets released on the outside.

And then Jake will talk about everything else. And there’s still a lot. The After Care facility that’s about to open on the church property. The classes we will teach there (parenting, finances and career development to start with—I’m helping write the content).

The set free campaign that’s running right now (more info at Godbehindbars.com) and the push to reunite inmates with families by inviting the family to watch the same service online at churchwithinmates.com.

So there you go! You just met just a few of the awesome people I get to work with. And heard a few of the things we are working on. At the moment I still get to be involved in many other areas of God Behind Bars, until the youth program will take off like CRAZY! :)

It’s frustrating at times that I can’t take pictures anymore of the people I minister to. (Big No No to bring a camera or cell phone into the prison! :) )

 

I wish I could show you ALL the things I get to do. But instead all I can do for now is just to say ‘Thanks Heaps!’. I am so blessed to be serving God in this area, so blessed to have you as friend and supporter of what I do. Thanks for making it possible for me to get up in the morning pumped and excited for what’s going to happen during the day.

You rock my life!

Oh, and that’s a picture of one of the prisons :)

Oh, and read some of these stories from some of 'our' inmates and the impact God Behind Bars has had on their lives:

Just a couple stories from inmates: One inmate, recently arrested and had lost everything, planned to commit suicide the day that her bunk mate invited her to a God Behind Bars service. She went, met God, felt loved and is ALIVE today, sharing her love of Christ with others around her.
 One inmate, that had gone through Celebrate Recovery (faith based recovery from hurts habits and hang-ups) and we had worked with in the Media Art Studio was able to land a job once she was released with the STATE! She helps others find work now! Loves God, is part of a church and reunited with her family!
 God Behind Bars was instrumental in changing another inmate’s life who was in and out of jail, but finally realized that there are people who love her and want to help her. She also is doing well on the outside.
 You can go to GodBehindBars.com to watch a video or two where they tell their own story.
 Tweets: Going to Germany for 10 days to attend my nieces confirmation and birthday! So excited.
 Prayer for ‘my’ juvies is appreciated as they’re starting to grasp the concept of God and His love for them. If you’re in Vegas, want to give me any of your dry clean hangers? :)
 Don’t forget to check out GodBehindBars.com 

Like a boss

Last week in small group we talked about reducing stress... And one of the 'stressful' things in my life right now is a trip I'm planning. 

Let me explain.... 

I am not from the US. I'm from Germany. I grew up in Germany in a lovely house in the middle of nowhere. (In the picture the house doesn't looks so 'lovely' coz it's over 110 years old and for the past 6 years nobody has lived in it. The new owners are in the middle of giving some much needed TLC)

About 6 years ago my Dad died and my Mum moved to her old house. And since I don't have warm and fuzzies toward my Mum's place (nor actually to my old house) I am now indeed 'homeless' when I go home. And that in a way adds stress.

So now I have to organise places to stay and people to see like it's a business trip. On top of that comes that I've lived in the States for quite a while and sometimes have a hard time figuring out what is American and what is German. 

One of the best examples is restaurants. Here in the States you see this:

             

 And everybody waits to be seated. Coz that's what you do! 

In Germany you're expected to find your own seat. And everyone does. It's NOT THAT HARD. But sometimes I forget which system works in which country.

So what's the deal? There's not much of a deal. It's just a fact. I know that for me to tell people about stuff from Germany here in the States means explaining it as well. And it ends up being a loooong story that no one wants to hear. 

(My friends for example have a very hard time understanding why a 'Bring Your Own Meet BBQ' is a really weird concept in the States.)

So you see, going 'home' for me is stressful. I have to organise places to stay, people to see, transport and a lot of other things. I have to mentally brace myself for the ridiculously bad customer service I will get and yet I will enjoy paying the price that is posted on the product - in the supermarket or in the restaurant, it won't matter! I can't wait for mettbroetchen (ground beef/pork on a buttered roll) and spaghetti ice cream (it only looks like spaghetti!). I will use the public transport and miss air conditioning, and I will bring my own meat to my friends BBQ (and it's gonna be sausage!) 

I'm gonna rock this trip like the boss I am! And thus I will finish this rather lengthy blog post about how small group helped me reduce stress by organising a trip like a boss